Bridging the communication gap with adult children.
“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.” Oscar Wilde
Raising a child is one of the most difficult assignments we will ever undertake in our lives. In effect, when you raise children you are a master builder and a sculptor chiselling a product in his image. Regrettably that image may not be a “shared reality.” As children grow they develop their own “images” of how things should be. They have their own apprehensions about what is important that reflect greater independence and maturity. Problems arise between parents and adult children when they fail to communicate effectively. The resulting communication gap often leads to friction. To close the gap, adjust your behaviour to reflect new understandings about your adult children.
Here are some suggestions:
- Effective Communication
Research studies have found that communicating with children on a regular basis can take you a long way in bridging the gap between parents and children. Listening and talking are essential elements for a healthy parent – child relationship.
- Change is the only constant
Change is an inevitable and important aspect of our growth and development. Everything evolves through change and the family is no exception. However, when a child reaches adulthood, this relationship must change. It is time for parents and adult children to relate to what they have in common– interests, hobbies, careers, parenthood– than to correct some behaviour. It is believed that the parents who ask for opinions would do well from those who are always offering unsolicited advice.